Requirements to be considered the SHIT™ (Speed Hike Interval Training)
SHIT™ work requires some serious ground rules.
This is an individual endeavor. There is an I in SHIT™, meaning that you should take care of yourself and not compare your SHIT™ to other people's SHIT™.
People have been known to SHIT™ together, often when camping is involved, but it is highly suggested that you simply take care of your own SHIT™.
Taking your own SHIT™ is okay, but taking other people's SHIT™ is never allowed.
SHIT™ should never be logged by a measured length. We are not a competitive group. Instead the following descriptors should be considered.
For the more literal or those needing to report your progress to a doctor, we suggest:
It was a _____ SHIT™
-long
-compacted
-well formed
-rocky/pebbly
-difficult
-easy
-smooth
-average
-wet
for those that like a little more euphemisms in their life, the following would work:
-colorful
-bumpy
-floral
-unusual
-spongy
just to name a few
Usually we highly frown upon running SHITs™ unless there was a party the night before.
As far as equipment, we suggest a good working water bottle, so that squirts don't happen. Please make sure to pack your bulky items the night before and hydrate well. We don't tend to stop to look at the flora or fauna, as we have serious SHIT™ to get done. Be mindful of poison ivy along trails, as we really hate post-SHIT™ itchiness. Pets are encouraged but please make sure to clean up after their SHIT™.
Location/Location/Location
I have heard, near water trails, you should keep an eye out for turtle-head SHIT™, it is my understanding that these trails can be uncomfortable and require very fast action.
I also understand that somewhere around Area 51 you can find some really great Klingon SHIT™.
If you SHIT™ in Kansas, you must watch out for corn snakes.
We do not recommend hiking too close to a teenager, as they really don't want you all in their SHIT™
Nonetheless, you should always vigilantly watch out for brown bears rambling at the park gates, this is often a sure sign that you need to take your SHIT™ elsewhere.
Foods we do not recommend bringing along for your SHIT™ are Baby Ruths™ or Hersey's Kisses™ as these can be very messy to wipe up.
Sometimes there are park fees, so please bring a few Franklins as you may have to drop a deuce especially if going SHIT™ at the White House.
Finally, it is very important to capture the moment. At some point, you may wish to sit and contemplate your experience. You may refer to these as Spiritual SHITs™. Often you leave with an enlightened experience.
14 Places to Poop before you die!
This is an individual endeavor. There is an I in SHIT™, meaning that you should take care of yourself and not compare your SHIT™ to other people's SHIT™.
People have been known to SHIT™ together, often when camping is involved, but it is highly suggested that you simply take care of your own SHIT™.
Taking your own SHIT™ is okay, but taking other people's SHIT™ is never allowed.
SHIT™ should never be logged by a measured length. We are not a competitive group. Instead the following descriptors should be considered.
For the more literal or those needing to report your progress to a doctor, we suggest:
It was a _____ SHIT™
-long
-compacted
-well formed
-rocky/pebbly
-difficult
-easy
-smooth
-average
-wet
 |
| My hiking buddy took two shits during my SHIT™. |
-colorful
-bumpy
-floral
-unusual
-spongy
just to name a few
Usually we highly frown upon running SHITs™ unless there was a party the night before.
As far as equipment, we suggest a good working water bottle, so that squirts don't happen. Please make sure to pack your bulky items the night before and hydrate well. We don't tend to stop to look at the flora or fauna, as we have serious SHIT™ to get done. Be mindful of poison ivy along trails, as we really hate post-SHIT™ itchiness. Pets are encouraged but please make sure to clean up after their SHIT™.
Location/Location/Location
I have heard, near water trails, you should keep an eye out for turtle-head SHIT™, it is my understanding that these trails can be uncomfortable and require very fast action.
I also understand that somewhere around Area 51 you can find some really great Klingon SHIT™.
If you SHIT™ in Kansas, you must watch out for corn snakes.
We do not recommend hiking too close to a teenager, as they really don't want you all in their SHIT™
Nonetheless, you should always vigilantly watch out for brown bears rambling at the park gates, this is often a sure sign that you need to take your SHIT™ elsewhere.
Foods we do not recommend bringing along for your SHIT™ are Baby Ruths™ or Hersey's Kisses™ as these can be very messy to wipe up.
Sometimes there are park fees, so please bring a few Franklins as you may have to drop a deuce especially if going SHIT™ at the White House.
Finally, it is very important to capture the moment. At some point, you may wish to sit and contemplate your experience. You may refer to these as Spiritual SHITs™. Often you leave with an enlightened experience.
14 Places to Poop before you die!
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